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Viewing entries tagged with 'apology'

Diversity and the ability to give and accept an apology

Posted by Philip on 26 January 2016, 11:00 am in , , ,

Diversity is diverse, infinitely diverse. As I wrote recently, "Self-awareness is more useful than having some form of "textbook knowledge" of other people. Because there are no rules of thumb for engaging respectfully and meaningfully with people if you want to acknowledge the true nature of diversity."

Part of this approach to diversity requires the willingness to be wrong and the humility to apologise. To heal the mistake, the generosity of the wronged party to forgive, is also necessary.

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Beyond apology and forgiveness

Posted by Philip on 27 October 2015, 4:51 pm in , , , , , , , ,

If there's one thing you can seldom plan for, it's conflict. Unless you're purposely pushing for an emotional rupture, or you're entering a meltdown situation with prior warning, conflict usually blind-sides you.

It's one of those, "you think one thing's going to happen and something else does" moments, about which Kathryn Schulz muses

All the hindsight in the world doesn't help. It's been said or done, can't be unsaid or be undone because, damnit, linear time travel hasn't been invented yet. Parallel time travel — well that's another post.

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Owning my projection; an acknowledgement and apology

Posted by Philip on 7 October 2015, 7:04 am in , , , , , , , , , ,

I got a fair bit of flack for the post I wrote on Friday, asking disabled people to toughen up and stop telling their stories of hardship in public. I also criticised inspirational speakers, as well as media portrayal of disabled people triumphantly doing ordinary things.

I'm not used to the kind of negative vitriole with which a few people responded — it was quite affronting and upsetting. Nevertheless, I should note, my disparaging audience was balanced ten-fold by those who liked the post. I've been reflecting on the reason for the offence and, prompted by a question by a more balanced commenter, why I feel so strongly about this issue. After all, strong reactions are mainly fuelled by psychological projection.

So, what I wrote was about me, not about the people I criticised. To answer the question, "Why is it affecting you personally so strongly?" I've reflected on what's going on for me.

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